Ahhh, I love the smell of "white trash run down farmhouse air" in the morning!.....Sorry, I borrowed that line from the movie "Apocalypse Cow!"........ "We're a bit upscale though, I've always made sure the stalled car in the driveway is an old Mercedes, and the old boat sitting in the yard is a wood one" Holy cow!..YOU were my neighbor growing up!
and yes, you are correct... if there is a "highly sought after" collectible out there rusting in the yard, YES , that IS a sign of upscale class...hahaha.
"Here in the South you would need a washing machine and old tires painted white in the front yard. Not to mention several dogs under the front porch."..... uuhhh, He has that also, it is called the Muckleshoot Reservation not too far away.....
"Dust from that crap is nasty stuff (like nerve damage nasty) so you don't wanta be breathing any more than you have to."..... Yes, he is definitely correct, We dont want to be calling you "Doc Bobblehead"...
"But I'm saying this old house stuff can cause nightmares...".... That's why I had to add the word "curse" along with the charm of a vintage house... haha... I would've freaked with the spiders also!!!